Say the Words
This edition of Worth More is all about preparation. Preparation as a tool for gaining in-the-moment stability and support; for growing confidence in high-pressure situations that have determinative consequences. Think a job interview, a sales call with a big account, or a new account whose business is important to your bottom line. Also, negotiations of any kind. You want things to go a certain way. You need them to. There’s a lot at stake for you!
Most humans, no matter how seasoned or skilled, will experience some emotions around such meetings. Anticipation and excitement at the very least, to nervousness, anxiety and even fear or panic on the more extreme end.
Did you know that the body’s physical reaction to both excitement and fear is very similar?
Whether you’d call the emotions positive or negative, the heart beats a bit faster, the palms get a little sweaty, the mouth a little dry. The stomach may knot, breaths become more shallow. We talk fast–too fast for these circumstances. Thinking gets jumbled and attentive listening goes out the window!
To prepare for this kind of critical meeting, we start well before it happens–when we’re not in the heat of the moment! When thinking is clear and emotions are calm. We know what we want. We know what we don’t want. We can consider various scenarios that may come up in the meeting and prepare ourselves to handle them.
We start with words.
Right now, in the comfort of your own space you can think. You can prepare. Here and now, you plan what you need to communicate. You choose your words with care. You craft what you want to say. You get so clear that you can write it down.
Write it down!
Rehearse it. Out loud, not in your head. With your mouth and vocal cords.
When you are in your meeting, all the physical responses will happen! To greater or lesser degree, you will experience all the above mentioned things! Don’t expect them to disappear. Don’t conclude that something is wrong when these responses show up. Nothing is wrong. You’re human.
The only thing more experienced professionals have that you don’t have yet is the ability to put the physical responses in their place. Experienced pros can focus on the business at hand. They still have these automatic reactions, but they no longer get their way. They've learned how to prepare and they are accustomed to tensions and butterflies. That’s all!
And you will be, too. Starting with preparing your words.
With your preparation, you’ll find you can remove your attention from the nerves and the physical responses that come from them. You simply say the words you have prepared knowing that they communicate what you intend. And you know this because of your thoughtful, thorough preparation done in advance.
Full disclosure: The words are the beginning.
We have not addressed the timing of your words, i.e. when to say them. Nor have we addressed the tone of your words, i.e. how to say them. We haven’t looked at what not to say. All of this is very individual. Each situation requires careful evaluation and specific foundational work. Choosing and rehearsing your words will get you started.
Prepare your words and say them.
I'm here to help.
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