IT’S NOBODY’S JOB TO CALL ME BACK.

That’s right.  It just isn’t.

It helps to remember that.  If I want or need someone else's time for anything, it’s MY job to make the calls, take the initiative, and make the connection.

I can’t tell you how often ambitious professionals whine about sending messages and not getting response. I’m sorry folks, but that’s what it is: WHINING. And it’s time to stop it already! 

But, how?

The first thing to do is adjust your thinking.  It helps to remember what your job is: To make contact. And then make it again. And again. And again. It’s ALL up to you. It’s a one-way street. A solo gig. Changing your thinking and remembering this really helps! Nothing is more paralyzing than thinking someone owes you something or thinking things “should be different.”  They are not. They are what they are and you’ll go farther much faster if you accept and work with it. Do you realize how many unsolicited messages come from unknown individuals to your prospects? Why should they respond?

CASE IN POINT: When my client Kate began to accept this reality and held no expectations of getting a response, everything changed.  Research shows that most new contacts require a minimum of 10 touch points (some say 20!) before they engage with you.  The trouble is most professionals get frustrated, or think they’re becoming annoying, and stop at just two or three attempts.  This was news for Kate and for her, it made all the difference.  Her new goal became finding creative ways to make these 10 contacts.  She created 10 "Kate-style" messages that were ready up front.  That’s right, 10 messages ready to go that were in her own voice and repeatable for any new prospect!  This made the outreach simple and allowed her to track exactly how many attempts she’d made and how many more were needed before thinking about adjusting her messaging. (Did you notice I didn't say: Before she could start expecting response? Nope. Not after 10. Not ever.) 

What’s more: 

• Resentment? Gone. 

• Feeling neglected? Gone.

• Chip on the shoulder? Gone.

• Frustrations and doubts? Gone.

This could be a very long list of all the energy sapping inner obstacles, objections, and depression inducing expectations that go POOF when we change how we think. 

Even better is what’s gained! A positive outlook inspiring possibility, more energy to work, more creativity, more fun, and many more engaged clients and prospects!

Unrealistic and unfounded expectations weigh us down both mentally and energetically.  You may be unaware that you’re harboring negative thoughts that quietly chip away at your confidence, creativity, and resilience.  Take a good look at what goes on in your head and try to see habits of thought.  Not so easy to do on your own, and that’s one reason working with a coach can be useful.  I help ambitious professionals build the career and life of their dreams!  Before strategy, we identify the mindset saboteurs that may be standing between you and the results you want.

Got an experience of changing your thinking? I'd love to hear how it worked for you! Please share your story in the comments. 

~Joyce

Kacin Point Consulting | Business coach | New York, NY, USA